Today we are talking about the 6th virtue included in the Being a Titus 2 Woman series. This series is based off of the book Feminine Appeal, which shares 7 virtues of a Godly wife and mother from Titus 2:3-5:
Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Now we have to remember that the goal of demonstrating these virtues in our lives is so “that the word of God may not be reviled.” Also, we need to remember that we are sinners and we are going to fail at living out these virtues day in and day out. We need the grace of God and the Holy Spirit working in us and through us everyday!
Today we are talking about Kindness. Now, for me personally I have always been a kind person who loves to serve others in many different ways. However, sometimes I forget why I am doing acts of kindness and have a sinful motivation. I think that before I was saved I was kind because it made ME feel good. However, now that I am a Christian, I should be kind because I am commanded by God to be kind, because it benefits the other person, and because it spreads the Good News of the Gospel!
Now, kindness isn’t just about what you do outside of your home. We are commanded to be kind inside of our homes! This is sometimes the hardest place to be kind. Carolyn says it this way (pg. 118),
You see, I thought of myself as a compliant, easy-going individual who hardly ever got angry. I naturally assumed that I would treat my new husband and future children with more kindness, love, and gentleness than I showed anyone else. Obviously, I was wrong.If you are a wife and mother, I am willing to bet that you too have been shocked by the resentment or hostility you’ve felt (and most likely manifested) toward your own family members. Maybe you sometimes wonder as I did: What happened to the kind, compassionate person I used to be?
However, thank goodness that God does not let me sit in my sin and deal with it myself, because I wouldn’t be able to and I would still be just as mean and angry. Thank goodness that God gives me the Bible and the Holy Spirit to guide me and mold me into a kind and love wife (And hopefully mother soon!).
Carolyn gives us a definition of kindness as (pg. 120), “a sincere desire for our husbands’ and children’s happiness.” What a wonderful thing for women and mothers to be desiring! This is what I want for my life, and I am sure the same is for you!
So, what are some of the main things that hinder us from showing kindness? “Three sins that often obstruct this godly desire are anger, bitterness, and judging” (pg. 120). I have seen each of these sins live in my life and hold me back from being kind.
So, let’s look at scripture’s solution for each of these sins (pg. 121-126),
ANGER
James 4:6-10 gives us a very direct solution, we must humble ourselves and submit to God. We must humbly confess and repent! Then, with God’s help, we can turn from anger and instead nurture kindness.
BITTERNESS
Ephesians 4:31-32 gives us again a very direct solution, we need to put all bitterness away from us! “So instead of dwelling on how we’ve been wronged, let us entreat the Holy Spirit to help us look at the cross. As we meditate on the undeserved mercy of God in forgiving our sins, we will freely grant forgiveness and kindness to our husbands and children” (pg. 123).
JUDGING
1 Corinthians 13:7 helps us find a solution for judging. “If we become conscious of believing the worst about our husbands and children, we must confess our lack of love for them to God. When we repent from judging, we will gain fresh passion for our families’ happiness” (pg. 125).
Through the grace of God and the intervention of the Holy Spirit, we can become kind women who are desiring our families’ happiness! Amen!
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Proir to marriage and children I would think feeling the sense of kindness would have been easier. Dealing with children who were not mine seemed less frustrating.We now have six children with different personalities. I believe dealing with them and them dealing with each other would be a part of our sanctification.I do often become unkind and impatient. I also become impatient with the women around me who live opposite of Titus 2:3-5. I am the only women in my church who does not work outside the home.
juliebrantner@gmail.com
We were talking about this 2 weeks ago in our ladies meeting after church… I think that prior to marriage I would have "thought" I was a nicer person… but that's because I didn't have so many sanctification tools in my life. :) It seems that the more sanctified I get, the more selfish I realize I am. The more mature I become, the more immaturity I realize is in me. Hopefully that makes sense? :)
Thanks for the thoughts!