I’ve known this to be true ever since we moved to KY and I started working. But, I didn’t know how to write about it…
I believe the best place for a women to be is in their home (Titus 2), serving God and their family in that way. And, I’ve been doing that for well over 2 years. It has been wonderful!
During the 2 years I was a full-time wife and homemaker, I have seen God working through me, like never before! I’ve seen enormous growth in my personal relationship with Christ and in my marriage. It was great to be able to be there for Michael when he needed anything. It was great to be there for my family if they needed anything. And it was great to be home awaiting an adoption placement once we had become licensed.
Now that we are here and we wanted to become debt-free and save a little bit of money before Michael starts school…it is hard.
It is hard because my heart wants to be home. I’ve been wholly satisfied in my role inside my home. lol…I had finally got the hang of managing a home and I had started learning new tasks, like sewing.
I know that working now is just a season. Next spring we are hoping to become licensed to Foster/Adopt and we are planning on me coming back home at that time. But, for now, here I am… And, it is hard…
It is hard to juggle all these things.
Most days, I feel like I am drowning, like sometimes I cannot bring my head above water…
I don’t remember it being this hard when I was working in the first few years of our marriage…but it is so hard now. And, I think the reason is because I know the ideal for our family. I know how it works!
And this is not it…
But yet, I press on. I get through each day (barely) and go to sleep, and then do it again.
I know that what I am doing now (Even though it is hard) is going to greatly benefit the future of my family. I know that by me working now, I’ll be able to stay home once our family expands. I know that by working now, we will be debt-free and able to pay for school easier without our monthly bills.
This is just a season, a short one even! But yet, in the midst of it I am often reminded of how hard it is to juggle all these things and not be able to give 100% to everything.
Each day, when I am struggling to get through, I look forward to coming home again.
You're right – it IS hard! But you've got a goal, and you're working toward it, and you'll get there!
Praying for you!
I'm finding it difficult and I don't work outside the home! I wish I was able to help in the quest to become debt-free (by bringing money in, not just finding great deals and spending my husband's paycheck wisely), but I don't see how it is possible when I can barely keep my head above water as it is.
I admire you and your willingness to endure these hard times for the great times to come. You are in my prayers!
Ashley,
I know how you feel completely. I have worked full time since we came to Seminary up until a couple months ago (now I'm part time — PTL!!). Before we moved here, I mostly worked part time in a pretty flexible job, so it was hard for me to deal with being gone all day every day. However, like you say, it IS a season. The Lord gives grace to me to keep on doing my part in Josh's seminary education, and he will give you the grace, too. Working hard like this every day outside of the home is VERY tiring and can be VERY discouraging. But this is the ministry set before you! I will pray the Lord can give you joy in the midst of this leg of the journey.
If you are like me, it is easy to become envious of women who get to stay home (esp stay at home moms). But every family is different, and you are good to work and support your husband in this way. What a blessing to have a heart that wants to be home! I know that pull and sometimes agonizing tension. I will pray for grace and joy for you!!
~Gretchen
Ashley,
I and many others long to stay at home. But with the economy the way it is it is really hard to make it with 3 children (one in college) on just one income. My heart is at home and my family always comes first. The Proverbs 31 woman did do work outside the home. I try to keep that in mind when I begin to feel guilty for not being at home full time. The devil has a way of making us feel inadequate. Pray for peace during you time of working outside the home. I will pray for you as well.
I really admire you…I want to be at home too when I get married (not at my parents house but you know what I mean!)
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